Funny Jokes For Children One Liners
Q: What is the tallest building in the world?
A: The library! It has the most stories!
Q: What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A: A waist of time
Q: Why did the banana go to the Doctor?
A: Because it was not peeling well
Q: Why is England the wettest country?
A: Because the queen has reigned there for years!
Q: Why do fish live in salt water?
A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!
Q: Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A: He wanted cold hard cash!
Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.
Q: What is the best day to go to the beach?
A: Sunday, of course!
Q: What bow can't be tied?
A: A rainbow!
Q: What season is it when you are on a trampoline?
A: Spring time.
Q: Where did the computer go to dance?
A: To a disc-o.
Q: What has one head, one foot and four legs?
A: A Bed
Q: What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
A: The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says "chew chew chew".
Q: Why did the birdie go to the hospital?
A: To get a tweetment.
Q: What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa?
A: A Clausterphobic
Q: What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?
A: Ouch
Q: Why was the guy looking for fast food on his friend?
A: Because his friend said dinner is on me.
Q: Why is a 2016 calendar more popular than a 2015 calendar?
A: It has more dates.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof?
A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs?
A: A penny.
Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A: Because he had no-body to go with.
Q: How do crazy people go through the forest?
A: They take the psycho path.
Q: What three candies can you find in every school?
A: Nerds, DumDums, and smarties.
Q: Why are pirates called pirates?
A: Cause they arrrrr.
Q: What do prisoners use to call each other?
A: Cell phones.
Q: Where do snowmen keep their money?
A: In snow banks.
Q: What washes up on very small beaches?
A: Microwaves!
Q: What goes through towns, up & over hills, but doesn't move?
A: The road!
Q: Why was there thunder and lightning in the lab?
A: The scientists were brainstorming!
Q: Why did Tony go out with a prune?
A: Because he couldn't find a date!
Q: What did the little mountain say to the big mountain?
A: Hi Cliff!
